Angry Dad Screams at Daughter: What Would You Do?

Photo credit: freedigitalphotos.net

Photo credit: freedigitalphotos.net

Today my 4 year old had his second dental surgery. I knew it was going to be more complex than his last surgery, so I was prepared to sit in the waiting room for awhile. I was not, however, prepared for what would go down in the waiting room while we were there.

My husband couldn’t go to Parker’s procedure with me today. His work schedule just didn’t allow for it. Since I had a sitter for Gage, I wasn’t too worried about it. After all, I’ve taken the kids to lots of doctors appointments and procedures alone. This wouldn’t be any big deal.

Shortly after we arrived, they ushered Parker back to get his vitals and give him a dose of happy juice. With Parker, the happy juice kicks in after about 10 minutes, and I cannot let him off my lap. He would seriously hurt himself if I did.

Just before Parker got his happy juice, a dad and his daughter walked into the dentist’s office. They signed in, filled out the paperwork, and then sat down. Just before they took Parker back to sedate him, the little girl received her own dose of happy juice.

Rather than sit his daughter on his lap, the dad put his daughter in the chair beside him – which also happened to be right next to me. Then, he hands her his iPad.

Ok, I thought to myself, he’s got a good 10 – 15 minutes before her happy juice kicks in. Hopefully he’ll be smart enough to take the iPad away from her.

Wrong.

10 minutes after she got the happy juice, the little girl decided she wanted to get up and walk. As she went to get up, the iPad flipped off her lap and landed face down on the wood floor. You could hear the screen shatter as it hit the ground.

The dad flies into a rage, screaming at his daughter for doing this. He’s calling her stupid, an idiot, and all sorts of other names that horrified me.

I couldn’t hold my tongue. I turned to him and said, “Sir. Calm down.” He then goes off on me… telling ME what an idiot his daughter is and if she hadn’t been so stupid, this never would have happened.

The poor girl is in tears by now. My heart is breaking and I say, “It wasn’t her fault. It was an accident.”

To which he replies, “Yeah, an $800 accident that never should have happened and only happened because she’s too dumb to hold onto the iPad.”

At this point, my blood is boiling. I mumbled, (making sure it was plenty loud enough for him to hear me), “You are the idiot that gave your six year old an $800 iPad to play with while she’s on happy juice.”

He tells me to “BLANK off,” and that’s the end of our conversation. (Although I had SO much more I wanted to say.) He then proceeds to call someone, (I’m assuming it was his wife), and tell them how stupid his daughter is…

I immediately sent a text to my husband, using my “angry thumbs,” and tell him how upset I am over how this guy is treating his daughter. All I wanted to do was snatch up that little girl and tell her it was ok… and then punch her father in the face.

They came out shortly after that and took her back to sedation, so I was left alone in the waiting room with this guy. I’m proud of myself for showing self control, because honestly – all I wanted to do was slug him. Hard.

I am not a perfect person, and I am not a perfect parent by any means. But, when I make the mistake of screaming at my kids, (which I do more often than I would ever like to admit), I always apologize. Usually immediately, but if not, I apologize shortly afterward. Then, that night, I make it a point to pull that child aside at bedtime and pray with them. I confess my sin to God in front of them so they know that not only do I need to make things right with them, I also need to make things right with God and get His forgiveness as well.

To watch this dad scream and yell at and about his daughter literally ripped my heart out. While I am thankful she was on happy juice, and she probably won’t remember this first hand, I have a horrible feeling that he will never let her forget it.

In my heart, I hoped that John Quinones with ABC’s WWYD would come out from behind closed doors and tell me this was all just an act. But, it didn’t happen. That poor little girl really had to suffer through a verbal beating from her father.

I couldn’t keep my mouth shut. I felt the need to step in and protect that little girl. Would you have done the same, or would you have made a different choice? I’m interested to hear what you would have done.

 

Angie Vinez (2666 Posts)

Angie is a wife and mother to 7. Her life revolves around cooking, cleaning, laundry, and other household duties. She is passionate about her life in Christ and wants to encourage other mothers in their own walk of faith. Angie is active on many social media networks, loves technology, photography, and graphic design, and loves creating blog designs for other mom bloggers.


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Comments

  1. 1
    Tabathia B says:

    Wow! I read the title and thought it was going to be some type of situation where the child was misbehaving and the parent got frustrated, I was totally wrong. I don’t think you were wrong and when the guy told you to “blank off” boy would I have went off on him. I think you totally handled this way better than I could especially since he gave his Ipad to a young child who was just given some “happy juice.” But you were great and I can’t believe the mom didn’t stop his rant when he was on the phone to correct his behavior towards their daughter (verbal rant calling her names to the mom).

    • 2

      I know. I am so thankful that I don’t have to deal with a husband like that, though. My heart is still broken for that little girl. :( We left before they did, and I haven’t been able to get her off my mind all day.

  2. 4

    That’s so sad. :( What’s worse is that people behave better in public than they do at home. I hate to think of what that little girl lives with on a daily basis. Heart breaking.

  3. 5

    I do NOT handle that well. I’m so glad you said something. That poor little girl. :(

  4. 6

    I would have done the same as you and said you’re the idiot for giving your daughter the ipad when she was on sedatives.. you’re the stupid one because you’re the adult and should have known better and when you’re daughter grows up believing she’s dumb it will be your fault because you are too caught up in your own crap to realize that a child on drugs should not have an ipad. Then I would have called CPS.

    • 7

      I also would have said, listen I am not a defenseless child and you can’t yell at me like you yell at your daughter. What a turd… this is why kids turn to drugs and try to get love when they get older by having sex with the every guy that shows an interest in them. Idiot fathers.

  5. 8

    Abuse is a vicious circle.

  6. 9

    I would have definitely said something to him, as well. Kudos to you. Then I would have called CPS to report his appalling behavior, making sure to ask any others in the waiting room for their names and phone numbers as witnesses to the abuse. I don’t say this to be mean, but I speak from the perspective of a social worker because that’s what I do. That child couldn’t protect herself, and deserved to have a rational, caring adult do it for her. You were in a difficult place, and did what you knew to do, and I applaud you for what you did to try to protect that child. Really, if the staff of the dental office heard or witnessed it, they are required by law to report it. If they heard and didn’t report, then they were grossly lacking in judgement.

  7. 10

    I completely agree with your reaction and would have been lucky to be able to hold my tongue at all in a similar situation. I most likely would have spoken up to get the attention of the father away from the poor little girl. It is his fault, not hers! He should have known better. In our home we have a rule that nobody is allowed to call another person stupid, dumb, or anything else that means the same. The last thing a child needs to do is be put down in such a harsh way. I am so proud of you for stepping in. A lot of people would feel it wasn’t there place and would just keep quiet, but you did the right thing! Thanks for standing up for that little girl!

  8. 11

    I would have done the same but with less self control. I hate seeing children being shouted at for doing nothing wrong. x

  9. 12
    Cassandra says:

    Not only would I have done what you did, THANK YOU, I would have also let the dental office staff know of his verbal abuse to his daughter, they may have mandatory reporting rules that would make them call children services, at a minimum – letting that jerk know that handling situation like he did was not only wrong, but likely punishable if continues. My prayers will be for peace for that little angel, bless her heart and so sorry that she has such a tool for a Dad.

  10. 13

    Ugh. Where to start? 1.) What was he thinking giving a kid who was essentially hammered an expensive toy like an iPad to play with? 2.) Does the moron not realize that there are cases out there that are designed to survive such impacts and it’s his own darned fault for not having one on to begin with? 3.) If that’s how he treats her in public, I’m afraid of how he treats her at home.

    I’d like to think that I totally would have said something.

  11. 14

    I think I may actually have punched him in the face. Hard. And told the little girl that everything was alright, that she didn’t do anything wrong. Would have been worth the assault charge.

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